What is the best way to show your partner that they are cared about? Knowing what to do or say sometimes feel like a challenge task without enough reward. Relationships are a work in progress and demand special attention to maintain satisfaction. For the most part, you can expect to get out what you’re willing to put into it.  However, at times it can feel as though we are putting in all of our best efforts, and yet…. speaking a different language. When this happens, it’s important to remember it’s not always about working hard.  Sometimes, it’s about working smarter.

This is where learning the “5 love languages” becomes essential to your relationship.  This idea is based on the principle that each one of us receives love in different ways

  1. Words of Affirmation
  2. Acts of Service
  3. Receiving Gifts
  4. Quality Time
  5. Physical Touch

If you were speaking a different language than your significant other, what kind of communication would that be?  Neither of you would be able to fully understand the other and you would both wind up confused, frustrated or not fully getting your needs met.

The way that you feel loved may be different than how your significant other receives love.  You may be giving affection via your own personal love language, and yet your partner is doing it differently—even if you both have good intentions. Imagine, both of you feeling that you’re doing everything you can to show your love and neither being able to fully feel cared about!  This is where we can ‘work smarter’!  For example, if you find that your significant other’s love language is “words of affirmation”, leave an encouraging and loving note on their nightstand or bathroom sink. These small gestures leave lasting a lasting impact – and will not go unnoticed!

Reflect on your own ability to receive love—and if you notice what your significant other responds to the most.  Take this quiz to determine your predominant love language (http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/.) Once you know yours and your significant other’s, you can implement strategies to help give and receive love in the most effective way possible.  Work smarter by putting your effort into expressing love in the language your significant other understands.  It may not be about putting in more work, it’s simply putting in the type of effort that will truly show your significant other just how much you love and care for them!

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